Discouragement and the LDStorymakers Conference

So this last Saturday I attended the LDStorymakers Conference. It was a two-day event, but I am a mom that has massive guilt if I leave my babies longer than three hours at a time, so I only attended one day. I left for the conference at 7am before my 15 month old baby was awake and didn't get home until 6:30pm. It was strange to be gone all day. I had never done that before with any of my children. It felt like I had been in an alternate universe. My children actually still function when I'm not there. Strange feeling. Anyway the conference was fun. I got to see a friend that I haven't seen for over a decade. She is still as beautiful as ever and I felt like I belonged there just because I know her. Also got to meet the authors of a lot of blogs that I read and many published authors as well. It was awesome. I totally made an idiot of myself as I gushed over Janette Rallison author of "My Fair Godmother" - also very awesome. I played it cool when I met Julie Wright author of "My Not-S0-Fairytale Life" - great book and she is very nice. Tons of authors there that I didn't know, but they were all very accessible.

Now for the discouraging part - There are a ton of talented and not so talented writers (me) in Utah. Also, the publishing industry is slow right now so not as many books are being published. Which is probably a good thing, but discouraging. Everyone at the conference was inspiring and encouraged all of us to never give up - but underneath that encouragement I felt an undercurrent that was actually encouraging me to give up. Writing is not for wimps. This is a true statement. Since I have been writing I am just beginning to understand this. I have done a lot of soul searching this weekend and there is a question that has been rolling around in my thoughts. The question is: Do I really want to keep writing even if I never get published?
3 months ago I might have said no. Now things are different. I have a story that won't let me stop. I have characters that are coming alive for me. I can see them. I hear their conversations in my head. I can't stop now. I only know the beginning of their story right now and like a book that I have been pulled into I now must find out whats going to happen next.

Even if my story is so three years ago, there must still be a place for it. Things like good versus evil, honor, glory and triumph over our heartaches and failures never go out of style. Themes like Faith, and there is a hero in all of us - are classic ideas needed now more than ever in this faithless, what's-in-it for me generation. So I am not giving up. If no one but my three boys ever read my story - it will be worth it.